Naked from the mouth down

The establishment of any human society requires, as a unavoidable prerequisite, the acceptance by every member that the society as a group retain the right to dictate ranges of acceptable and unacceptable actions, and that performing the latter might carry social penalties of varying severity. Furthermore, the acceptability or not of many actions is strongly dependent on many circumstances, what makes the decision so hard that many never manage to fully understand it, while others make a living out of walking along the edge and intentionally stepping over the line to exercise criticism or cause hilarity. In the end, the goal is for everyone to go through a double filter when considering possible actions: the first one is the adequacy of the actions to the goals of the individual and the second is the acceptability of the action by the society. 

Being that not every action that passes the first filter is able to also go through the second, one corollary of being a member of a society is that every one is less free to act than they would be on their own. Considering as well that the social norm establishes limits to the intensity of the actions, where no action is almost always acceptable and pretty much every acceptable action will eventually become unacceptable if performed with enough intensity, this filtering effect can be called tempering (making lukewarm) or moderating (making close to a typical value).

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One interesting consequence of the double filter is the existence of this group of unfiltered actions that get considered as possible on an individual level but get rejected as socially unacceptable. Are we to be judged by the ideas of actions that we had or only by the actions we did? How about the thoughts we have versus the words we say? There is a recurrent theme in books and movies (see Liar Liar (1997) with Jim Carrey) that explore the consequences of individuals being unable to apply the social filter, blurting out inconvenient comments and acting completely out of line.

The second consequence of the double filter is the need for privacy, in particular the exemption of certain norms in spaces (real or virtual) with restricted access. As an example, even if drinking in excess is socially frown upon, there is in principle no law (other than eventually the laws of biology) preventing you from drinking a lot in the privacy of your home. Of course, the norm for not making loud noises still applies and is to be followed even in a state of inebriation.

The differences among sub-societies or even between the private and the public sphere might result in a certain dissonance between how we present ourselves in one group or the other, and forces us to be constantly gauging the level of acceptability of our actions and attitudes within each group.

Probably, this constant need for control is what justifies our need to be mostly clothed: we have only limited working room to change the way our bodies look, but with the addition of clothes it is much easier to hide our flaws while putting the spotlight in our virtues. This is also why civil liberty associations are always fighting against the police state: in most cases there are certain features of ourselves that do not make us happy or plainly horrify us, which pushes us to hide them as not pertinent to the public sphere. The advocates of the police state argue that you have nothing to fear if you behave correctly, but the consequences of the state knowing that you are repressing certain impulses only because of social pressure can have deep cutting effects on our liberties.

The 1956 novella "The Minority Report" by American author Philip K. Dick and its the homonymous movie (2002) present a dystopian feature where the behavior of people can be anticipated by a trio of prescient beings. This predictions are then used to prevent crimes from happening, but it has the consequence of people being convicted on suspicions, not on facts. What would have happened if an accidental criminal would have changed path just before the crime? It is good that the social norms these days require the deed to have happened or, at least, substantial steps towards enabling the crime (but then with a lower punishment).

I come to thing today about privacy because I had an appointment today with my dental hygienist for my regular cleaning, and every time I visit her I undergo a number of unusual feelings related to the social norms. First of all, dental hygiene is something very personal, which even with Karen I only discuss in passing, so talking about it with a stranger feels a bit like a slight breach of trust. The second aspect is that I try to brush my teeth as carefully as possible, but it is unavoidable that the operation is not always optimal and, month over month, the situation eventually degrades slightly. As with nudity, I am painfully aware that some things are "sub-par", but I am not usually able to identify them, so having them pointed out to me is, to a certain extent, embarrassing. 

The third aspect is the unavoidable sensation of helplessness while sitting on the chair. I have to admit that I have nothing to complain from previous treatments, she has always been very friendly and only in very rare occasions have I suffered any amount of pain, so I would have no reason to feel defensive about her fiddling in my mouth and yet, I find myself over and over under an inexplicable state of tension, squeezing my fingers on my lap while she works away. I force myself to relax, but it does not take long for my body to switch back to alarm state. I guess I would not make a great spy.

The final aspect is the physical proximity of a person outside my closest circle of familiarity. The feeling is the same when the dentist checks my teeth twice a year, but that is barely ten minutes while the hygienist spends almost one hour with me. Also the fact that, lying on the chair, I end up looking at the underside of her chin, which is an unusual perspective in everyday life, contributes to the strangeness.

That said, the overall experience is not necessarily unpleasant, but somewhat interesting and also a bit odd. And odd can be good in a time of monotony such as the one we are living. If the cost of having an unusual day is laying on a chair for an hour with a naked mouth, so be it. I hope you have an interesting evening.