To live means to hurt and to be hurt

Looking at it from a certain distance, it is astonishing to which extent life is inextricably linked with scarcity. The fact that life as we now it requires a constant consumption of energy to perform its functions is a perfect guarantee that any life form will, under any circumstance, end up reaching a point where it faces shortages. 

If we consider the counter example of a mineral, it is true that it will be necessary a certain amount of energy to create a diamond (or a cube of pyrite, a prism of aragonite, a column of basalt or any other mineral formation), but once it exists in can stay like that for millions of years without any need for additional energy. However, every plant, every animal, every fungus, every lychen and even every bacterium that you might find on or under the surface of the earth needs to feed itself one way or another to be able to function. And considering that the main function of living beings is producing new beings in exchange for the energy they consume, it is clear that in any finite environment living being will tend to spread without restriction until they deplete the resources of the environment, thus creating scarcity.

Photo: TheeErin

The other remarkable feature of life is the competition, particularly the fact that it happens not only among species but also with each species: If we seed a few bacteria in a Petri dish they will start to spread and initially there will be little competition among the individuals, because as long as there is unclaimed real state their is no need to fight over the food: the stronger ones might push away the weaker ones, but even those will find places to eat if they are ready to move a bit further. But once they take all the available space, there will be no place to go, both for physical space and for food, so there will automatically be winners and losers, some that will continue to thrive while others will be forced to choose between going into hibernation or dying (and when you have no hope of coming back from the hibernation, what is the difference?). This behavior happens the same if we have two different types of bacteria seeded on opposite ends of the culture plate: they will expand until they run into one another, with the only difference that they might be more apt at fighting the other type of bacteria than their own.

In nature we see this mechanism working in a much more complex way in what is called ecosystems, these communities of living organisms linked together in a complex chain of energy production, mainly by depredation of one species by another, but also through other relationships such as symbiosis or parasitism. A well-known example of these dependencies is the case of the wolves and rabbits as described by the Lotka-Volterra equations: the number of wolves grows with the number of rabbits (as food) and decreases with the number of wolves (as competition), whereas the number of rabbits grows with the number of rabbits (through mating) and decreases with the number of wolves (by being predated).

On a human level, an particularly in the last century, we have understood that these limits are unavoidable and rather than forcing ourselves to make a selection of who lives and who dies when the food is scarce we have jointly agreed to try to limit our growth instead, so that the food supply is reasonably guaranteed. It is remarkable that by this agreement we are not removing the natural constraints, just translating them into different terms to make the limitations easier to bear.

Still, every day we are bound to hit one limitation after another: from the living quarters we have, to the food we eat or the activities that we have conduct to feed ourselves, all these are constraints that we have learned to live with. It is obvious that many of this constraints are only proxy constraints, because for many of us not working a day or even a couple of weeks does not mean that we do not eat at all in that period of time, but if we stop working throughout we will eventually run out of food.

And living together makes the situation even more complex, because it not only introduces more interactions (among the family members) but also additional proxy constraints (things that one gives up for the sake of others or demands that one has). As a parent, every time your child asks your for something that you cannot fulfill (either by material or moral reasons) you are bound to hurt them with your denial and to be hurt by your own need to hurt them. But it is all good and necessary that we understand the need for these small hurts to avoid bigger ones. And although it was not inspired by it, this sentiment is present in the Christian tradition as in Psalms 84:6, where it speaks of the Valley of Weeping to refer to all the suffering that life entails.

This already long rant comes on the occasion of a cartoon where the father of a girl talks to the newly introduced boyfriend very seriously "if you ever hurt my girl..." even if hurting one another is unavoidable and good within measure. Incidentally the cartoon finished with "... she will kick your butt, that is how strong she is", which I found very inspiring in the way it breaks away from the stale father-protector figure.

The consideration that hurting our loved ones is a natural part of life might be considered rhetorical but it is nonetheless true. It is the intensity of the hurting that has to be kept at bay, because the only way to not hurting anyone is, like in the case of the bacteria, to go into hibernation and stop functioning. And I'd much rather not go into hibernation. Have a nice week.